Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Why Should The Liberals Be The Only Ones To Benefit From The Dead?

Note: This Post is Not Serious!

It seems that the Liberals have come up with a new innovation in including the political grassroots; allowing the dead to become members. This idea, from one of the Liberal Leadership Race's frontrunners, Joe Volpe (Who, with the endorsement of Alphonso Gagliano, is unstoppable), is so great for a few reasons:
  1. There are more dead people in existence than live ones.
  2. Some of the greatest political talents are dead.
  3. The dead tend not to demand much in the way of election promises.
The Liberals have taken Volpe's idea, and have begun massive recruitment of the dead, sending out a letter from Mackenzie King, a dead Liberal PM who was good at talking to the dead in his life.

But wait! Why should the Liberals hog the dead? The NDP and Conservatives should hop on the bandwagon too.

For the NDP, they should dig up Tommy Douglas from the grave. I mean, the members of the NDP basically worship this guy as a hero right now anyways, and even Liberals quote the guy sometimes, so by bring him back, we can form a majority government easily. Right now!

For the Conservatives, I don't want to give any ideas, but maybe they can bring back John Diefenbaker. That would result in getting all of the moderate "Red Tories" that are in the Liberal Party to come back home to the Conservative Party, thus increasing its vote share.

My, the Liberals will eventually live (die?) to regret coming up with this idea. After all, NDP and Conservative dead can beat their dead any day.
Time:

1 comment:

Muskwa Littlebear said...

Just in time for Halloween no doubt. Great timing by 'Smoking' Joke (er, Joe) Volpe. Just think, you too can dress up as a Liberal Delegate for Volpe! All you need is a bed sheet with two eye holes cut out.

And with Tommy Douglas running around, this will no doubt put a bit of a cramp in the Liberal's claim to be the 'defenders of Healthcare', so maybe they'll take up serious issues like: protecting us from the notwithstanding clause. That is provided, however, that they don't bring Trudeau back from the dead either - although, I think Ignatieff might be channelling his spirit right now.

I wonder what the Greens would do.. nevermind wasting their time trying to get live voters, move on to the people most affected by the soil and grounds - the dead!

And the Communists could have Stalin, Marx, and Lenin come out and speak to their delegates - which are probably dead too.

Yes, I think I see potential here.

Shawn

10:07 p.m.

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